- The use of words to express something different from and often opposite to their literal meaning.
- An expression or utterance marked by a deliberate contrast between apparent and intended meaning.
I understand we Americans don’t read so good, and because this is such a frequently asked question, we’ve decided it was time it merited its own page on the website. So here it is:
Why do you hate bikes?
- I hate my bike because it makes me feel bad about myself.
- See this scar right here? Not that one. Not that one either. Or that one. That one. That one right there.
- See. #1. My bike makes me look fat.
- I blame my bike for my major suck-fest at the slopestyle/ DH/ Super D/ jam/ whatever last night.
- Two words: flat tires.
- My bike makes me feel like a little bitch.
- If you love bikes, you’re helping the terrorists win.
- This bike is so last years model. I’m over it.
- See #1. My bike makes me feel slow.
- Because I can’t afford to replace my top of the line Saint derailleur on my DH bike this week.
- Because I hate freedom, puppies, and blow jobs.
- Because it keeps breaking on me. It let me down when I needed it the most. Why?!!! Why did you leave me!!!!?
- Fuck you. I love my bike.
We know you feel it. Leave some good reasons below; the best ones will be added to the list.